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Monthly Archives: April 2014

A Bulleted List for Bon Bon

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The last couple of days have been very taxing.  I’m going to put the whole ordeal into bullet form to make it easier to digest…there’s a lot to the situation.

  • On Saturday, April 12, Justin and I took Bonnie down to the Eno, a big wooded park, for a walk.  She loved it and had a blast.  We got home and found some ticks on her, removed them, disposed of them, and then thought nothing more about it.
  • On Thursday, April 17, Bonnie began acting funny.  She seemed a little reserved at first, not wanting to come out of the bedroom or interact with Dave when he was over.  As Dave was leaving, Justin tried to get Bonnie to go outside for her nightly walk.
  • She was very reluctant and Justin said that once they got down the stairs, she just sat on the grass and refused to go to the bathroom at all.  Upon trying to get back up the stairs to our apartment, Bonnie had a lot of trouble and Justin had to carry her up the last half-flight because she couldn’t do it.  We were becoming increasingly concerned about her.
  • Friday, April 18, we were getting ready to head down to Spartanburg for Easter weekend.  Bonnie was still very out of it, now much weaker.  She flat-out refused to go for her morning walk with me.  She lay on the couch, looking absolutely pathetic.
  • Justin came to check on her that afternoon at lunch, but she still didn’t want to go outside.  She wouldn’t eat, nor move from the couch.
  • We finally got her to the car and on the drive home decided to take her to an emergency vet as soon as we got into town.
  • We rolled into Spartanburg around 11 and got to the vet.  Both our mothers met us there.
  • The doctor was a complete asshole.  He had just gotten out of a surgery and decided to take it out on us and treat us like a thorn in his side.
  • At one point, he wanted to look at Bonnie’s tummy.  I tried to make her lay down on the examination table so I could roll her over.  He got impatient, grabbed her ankles, and pulled, causing her to fall over.  Justin and I caught her and I began making a mental note to look into voodoo curses.
  • After hearing about Bonnie’s ticks from the previous weekend, that’s all he wanted to focus on.  Clearly, we are horrible parents because we didn’t keep the ticks and he could have given us a better diagnosis if we had kept them and blah blah blah.  He was a total dick.  He didn’t listen to us about her leg pain — obviously, that’s from the disease the ticks gave her, why weren’t we listening?
  • He prescribed some antibiotics, charged us a small fortune, and sent us on our way.  He promised that after the first dose she would make a complete turnaround.  She’ll be a completely different dog.
  • The stupid meds did absolutely nothing after three doses.
  • My mother-in-law called in outraged, demanded pain meds, and went with Justin to pick them up while I stayed with Bonnie.
  • The pain meds seemed to be helping as little as possible.  After several hours, Bonnie finally moved on her own, went into her crate and stayed there until we left Sunday morning.  She refused to drink anything the entire weekend, but ate food that was offered to her.
  • We got to my mom’s on Sunday afternoon for Easter lunch.  Bonnie lay on several of Dolly’s beds until we left to go home.  She did fine in the car all the way home, finally laying down.
  • We carried her up the stairs, where she retreated to the closet for the night.
  • We took her to her vet first thing Monday morning.  They were incredible to her, and actually took her symptoms into account instead of relying solely on one random occurrence.
  • She was diagnosed with Beagle Pain Syndrome.  It’s like they wrote this page about us.
  • They kept her for the day, administered some of her remaining meds and started her on a new medicine, a chewable one that she only needs once a day.
  • She already seemed in better spirits when we picked her up around 5:30.  The vet filled us in on everything and sent us home.
  • She was very loopy from a shot of pain medicine that they gave her, but she wasn’t so visibly hurting.
  • We took her home, and she hung out in the living room with us.
  • She’s under strict orders to take it as easy as possible for two weeks.  We have to carry her up and down the stairs to go for walks for one week.  She should make a full recovery after four weeks.

She slept in the closet the entire night last night.  It’s weird not feeling her against me as I sleep.  I miss her, her attitude, her sass.  I’m so happy it wasn’t a permanent/chronic condition (even though this syndrome can relapse).  She’s a perfect dog, and I can’t wait until she’s finally acting more like herself.


From last night. The first time she’s been in her window in almost a week.


Suit Up: My Thoughts on the HIMYM Finale

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Last night, I thought I was going to be sick.  After the bomb about Barney and Robin was dropped, my stomach tightened.  And then, the entire rest of the episode had me screaming, “NO!” at my TV and dry heaving.  I cried so much that my eyes got puffy and Bonnie actually got worried about me.

As I wrote yesterday, I wasn’t completely invested in the show from the beginning.  But over the last five years, I was loyal.  Loyal as they come.  “Oh, Monday?  Yeah, can’t do Monday, that’s HIMYM night” kind of loyal.  Last night made the last five years of my life and the last nine years of other fan’s lives one big lie.  A joke.  The show should now posthumously be called, “How I Settled For Your Mother After Aunt Robin Dumped Me So Many Times.”

I can’t watch this show the same way anymore, not knowing what the finale taught us.  The entire show is not what it seems.  It is so cruel.  I am so broken and I feel so cheated.

Thankfully, I am not alone in my anger and feelings of betrayal.

I had originally planned to write a post in bullet form describing the several issues I have with last night’s finale, but having scoured the Internet for reassurance, there are some sources who summed up my thoughts perfectly.  And here they are…

It tried to make several grand statements—about the importance of the Ted-and-Robin pairing, about the sad slog of adult life after everyone stops hanging out at the bar, about loving things with everything we have while we still have time. But they weren’t the sorts of things How I Met Your Mother was about when it was one of the best sitcoms on TV, making the finale retroactively ruin what the show was building to. Every time I rewatch an episode and hear Future Ted lecturing about the importance of true love, I’ll just hear “Kids, I really want to date Robin again.” And when I rewatch “Legendaddy” or any one of the episodes that helped turn Barney into a real person, I’ll know my emotional investment in him isn’t going anywhere. “Last Forever” wasn’t fair to viewers, but it was even more unfair to the episodes that made fans love How I Met Your Mother in the first place.

-from this article


The whole ninth season was centered around Barney and Robin’s wedding and then in the final episode of the ninth season, Barney and Robin get divorced. During the same episode as the one that featured their wedding reception.

Oh yeah by the way, that macabre fan theory that The Mother has been dead this whole time turned out to be fucking true.

We don’t know how she died, but we do know that she died when her two children were relatively young.

We also know that the show took approximately two beats to convey this. It was brutally quick. It was Red Wedding sudden. La la la la we find out The Mother’s name is Tracy. La la la, Tracy gets sick and then that’s fucking it. Now suddenly we’re in the living room and it’s the year 2030 and Ted somehow magically does not have the voice of Bob Saget and his kids are giving him dating advice and reminding him that his wife has been dead for six years. For them she’s been dead for six years. For us, she’s been dead for six seconds.

The whole damn show was just a framing device for a widower to tell his kids that he’d pretty much wanted to nail his ex the whole time.

And at the end of the show, Future Ted is encouraged by his kids to go on ahead and try to date Future Robin, successful international news anchor, and her weird bob wig. Future Robin still lives in the same apartment in Brooklyn with the same number of enormous dogs, which cannot possibly be the same dogs unless they’re genetically modified super dogs with unnaturally long life spans. And Ted’s always been in love with her. So basically, The Mother was the woman Ted hung out with for a few years until she died, freeing Ted to seek out the company of the love of his life, Robin. Who, devoted watchers of the show might recall, is unable to have children. Ted really ends up having it all!

Come to think of it, are we sure that Ted Mosby didn’t murder The Mother? (We’re pretty sure.)

-all incredibly true and from this article

I tried to enjoy Season 9. I thought the 200th episode was actually quite fantastic in that it changed things up and let the Mother (Tracy) narrate and talk about her friends and life experiences. But by that point, the show had drifted too far from its roots. Instead of focusing on a group of friends who were dealing with highs and lows and issues of simple, everyday life, the setting was now one extraordinary weekend — 56 hours to be exact — with flashforwards and a few flashbacks crammed in between.

An entire season devoted to their wedding and 20 minutes into the last episode of the whole series, that relationship had totally crumbled.

We’d spent nine years hearing Ted talk about his wife, only to find out they were married for just 10 years before she was taken from him. And to top it all off, her death was covered in mere seconds on screen. It felt like we had been cheated. We had already been cheated of most of her life, in both background stories and future time, and then her death flipped by as a picture in a montage that preceded the show’s final moments. The closest thing to a memorial for Tracy, the Mother for whom the show was named, was an extra second that lingered on a portrait of her smiling. After nine years of building up this woman, she deserved more than that. And so did we. But if they had been set on this ending since the show began, if they were determined to have Ted and Robin come full circle and end up together in the finale, why didn’t they spend all of Season 9 playing that story out?  Robin only ever wanted to get serious with Ted when she couldn’t have him. But he deserved someone that wanted him just as much as he wanted her. And that person was Tracy.

-from here


I feel like I should mention that I am not 100% offended by this ending that I was witness to last night.  A lot of it makes sense.  I’ll even admit that a lot of loose ends were tied up.  There are numerous clues throughout the 9 seasons that allude to the mother’s death, so that wasn’t completely unexpected.  Unwanted, sure, but not unexpected.  But for Ted to end up with Robin?  For the Mother to serve as a place holder until Ted could finally be with the one he really wanted is absolutely ruthless.  Every ounce of character development over the last couple of seasons is irrelevant, because everyone reverts to who they were way back in season 1.  A bad storyline that was supposedly wrapped up in the pilot episode is instead how this entire franchise goes out.  It’s just unfair.  After everything that everyone had to endure, go through, and grow up for, none of it matters.  Everything that “happens” after the pilot episode is incorrect, and false.  Because all that matters is that Ted and Robin end up together.

I know it’s a TV show.  I know the characters aren’t real, and that none of this really happened.  But the last five years of my life were real.  And this ending to what should have been a magnum opus of a TV show is inexcusable.